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How I conquered my fear of failure…


I want to get vulnerable here and share a journal entry of mine:

I am worried again that I won't be able to make A Purpose Life a self sustaining business that I can run full-time and still survive.

That was the fear that reared its ugly head which made me question the decision I made at the end of 2020 to bank on myself full-time and turn down job offers to work at another subsidiary of the bank given its closure in Barbados.

Over time I sought out the skills, tools, and resources I needed to not let that fear of failure stop me. I redefined what success meant to me.

I launched A Purpose Life in 2020 and did coaching part-time while I worked at the bank. From 2021, I went full time and revenue earned collectively from 2021 – 2022 was approximately $21,000. Admittedly in 2021, I was learning about online business and my industry and hardly sold my offers as I knew nothing about lead generation, marketing, or sales.

That year was all about investing in my personal and professional development. I hired a high ticket coach, joined memberships, bought courses and books, you name it. I invested $67,000.00 in myself.

Moreover, I felt comfortable knowing I had close to six figures in my bank account which was an accumulation of my severance and money I saved two years prior to my redundancy.

At the beginning of 2022, I realized that I needed to put myself more out there and that is when the momentum started to pick up. Of course, when you do so, you can expect some rejection along the way but the key is not taking it personally although it stings.

I made a vow to show up consistently in my business. I started writing journal entries in my gratitude journal as doing this shifted my mindset and my perception of the world. Tip: It is a great idea to look back at past journal entries and see your thought process, fears, and hopes.

Further thoughts expressed below

What if A Purpose Life fails… and what does failure look like? Right now A Purpose Life only made $13,000.00 this year and before I had a job to support me. If I am concerned with what people think then no one would know if it fails and I can keep doing what I am doing. A Purpose Life is not funding my lifestyle but I am still growing it. If A Purpose Life never funds my lifestyle who is to say another job can’t? If things are not going according to plan I need to realize that even when everything in my life has not gone to plan I still survived.

Looking back at the above, I felt so anxious. I had doubt, hopelessness, and fear about how I would take care of my bills. But my faith in God reminded me that these thoughts were not mine. I mean it was God that told me after I reach my 10th anniversary at Citi, it was time to embark on entrepreneurship although I did not have a clue what I was signing up for.

I started to put some sticky notes around my desk with affirmations such as:

  • I am worthy
  • I call forth what rightfully belongs to me
  • I will choose to fight for what I know I am worth
  • I am a 100K a month coach
  • I attract wonderful clients who ask for my help and are ready to do the work

Visualization also worked where I would take a few minutes at the start of my day and see myself operating at the highest level in my business. I engaged all of my senses and it made the impossible feel possible. I continued to write in my gratitude journal.

A lot of what I wanted was manifested. Right now as I write this letter to you the revenue I made in the 1st Quarter of 2023 has surpassed what I made monthly in Corporate as well as the revenue made collectively in 2021 – 2022. I was so busy impacting lives that I only recognized this when I completed my 2022 tax returns.

Looking back I was never a failure… I get to decide what failing means to me. You also get to decide what failure means to you. I will continue to pursue my goals even if I attain them or not because failure to me is the person who never tries and misses the mark every single time.

I run through challenges, and new experiences because it is not about the destination but the journey.

Success also has its unique definition for me which is doing what I love, creating impact, transforming lives, using my voice to speak on issues, spending time with loved ones, and having the time and freedom to do what I want, when I want to do them. What I have found is when you make an impact, money follows easily.

Whatever success looks like to you, that is what you should be working towards.

If there’s something you want, something you desire, or things you’re working towards but you have fear and doubt, I hope my story helps you.

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